i feel like i rewrite my manifesto far too often but eh. it's my website i can do what i want. i have two main purposes for making this website. the first is fairly personal and therefore fairly difficult to explain. due to circumstances beyond my control, i have always felt not quite real, a reflection, a half-baked idea, a ghost, you get the picture. i'm pretty sure this is a pretty common feeling and i'm sure there are thousands of ways people choose to deal with this. for me it's this website. i always ask myself "who are you?" and i hope this website will answer that question. my website is for me and me alone, i don't have to project a version of myself for the sake of others, nor do i need to worry about anything i say here putting people off. i can be some guy named julian who really likes manga for tween girls and i don't need to defend myself or fit myself into a box. because as much as julian is not my name, and no one, not even my online friends, calls me that, i think "julian" is the closest to "me" i'll ever get. i guess what you (the imaginary concept of "you" that is really "me", because as i said i don't really maintain this place for the sake of anyone but myself) can get from that is that this website is like the box of important things i keep on my shelf, with my figures and keepsakes and cards, except instead it's pictures of anime boys and my long-winded commentary. my second reason is much less personal and as a result much easier to articulate. i, like many, hate the current state the internet is in. i do not want to buy. i do not want facebook to know my favorite subject from middle school. i do not want to fight over clicks like a cat over food. i want to express myself and learn and make friends. so that's what this website is. an escape from the corporate internet, an escape from the weird cruelty of social media comment sections, an escape from buy buy buy. i know all this might sound overly serious for a guy who blogs about tv for people nearly half his age, but these things are important to me, and i like talking about them, and i want to be true to myself. so here we are. the shoebox on my bookshelf where i keep every knick-knack and keepsake i have no use for but love anyways.
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